What most of you don't know

I have been running for only a year now. I was at the gym last summer and out of the blue decided to hop on the treadmill and see what happened. Much to my surprise, I could run! I had not run more that a couple feet in 11 years (really even before that). Why?

In October 1999, I was in a car accident. Someone did not yield to a light and smashed into me. My car was totaled and so were my knees. I'll never ever forget that night. The pain I felt in my legs was indescribable. In the ER I learned that both of my knee caps were broken. Braces were applied to both legs and I was hospitalized for 5 days. During those 5 days, I questioned if I would ever walk again. Everyone told me I would but if you felt what I felt, you would have had little confidence too. On day 5, my well medicated body stood at the bedside with a therapist (and crutches) on each side supporting my weight. I took a few very painful and slow steps to the door. I did it! So I knew I COULD do it. My next concern was if I would ever walk normal.

I was forced to move out of my house in Erie where I was living for college and back home with my parents (40 min away). I was unable to care completely for myself...or even get from one room to another without help. I had to drop a couple of classes, make special arrangements for another and finish a couple of others by actually sitting in lecture. Really. Where would the world be without moms?! My mom drove me to my classes a couple times a week and pushed me around in a wheelchair with both legs sticking straight out...(remember the braces?) (Side story- because my legs were sticking straight out, the chair was front heavy. She almost dumped me out over a street curb during one class change! Now, I am laughing just thinking about it but it was not so funny then.) She sat outside my classes and waited. She, along with my dad and grandparents, also drove me to physical therapy three times a week when I was not in class and to multiple orthopaedic doctor appointments.

Finally the bones healed and the day came when the leg braces were removed! My legs looked like toothpicks! I am not exaggerating. I had lost sooo much muscle mass during that 8 weeks. Physical therapy continued into the spring semester but by that time I was able to move back to Erie and live with roommates again. I saw a different physical therapist there and really felt like I was progressing with her.

As the years went on, my leg strength slowly began to rebuild. I could at least walk normal but still dealt with pain for quite some time. I was on osteoarthritis medication throughout the rest of college and had to be very careful with my leg positioning. I could not squat down without pain and forget kneeling...that was just not an option.
Finally, over the last 4 years or so I felt pretty normal. I could squat and kneel with only minimal discomfort. Because of all this though, I am very protective of my knees. I used to rollerblade and even snowboard a couple times a year. I have not done either since. I am terrified of twisting or landing on my knees.

Now you see why the thought of running was never even a flicker of a thought in my mind and why I was so shocked when I actually did it for the first time. I felt like I had won the battle. I knew at that moment that my knees were working the way they were intended. Yes, it felt very weird and unnatural but good at the same time. I started slowly increasing my time on the treadmill until Nicole Silvis talked me into my first race. At that time, running a 10K (6mi) seemed so unrealistic but with her encouragement and my strong will to beat that old injury..I did it!

Now I'm training for a marathon. So many people ask me why I am so doubtful that I can actually finish this marathon...now you know. I still doubt that I can complete a 26.2 mile race on my own. I know that I KNOW that it is ONLY through God that I am able to do this. I truly believe that if I was doing it for any other reason than to please Him that it would not be possible. I am literally "Running On Faith."

Again I say, "I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength." Philippians 4:13.


My knees have had a few aches and pains along the way during training but overall have been the least of my problems...until last Saturday. Out of the blue, one of them started aching to the point where I had to cut my distance down during training runs. I took today off from running to rest and refocus. Praying for a pain free 8 miles tomorrow!

My Toe...an update

Not running for a week was much harder than I expected but I knew it was the smart choice. Tuesday night I was sure my toe was broken. After much prayer and rest, the pain subsided very quickly starting Thursday afternoon....after I had already gotten the xray of course. Friday I got confirmation from the doctor that it was just badly bruised and I could increase my activity as tolerated. I went out Saturday for a medium long run and it felt great..as if nothing had ever happened!! God had been SO good throughout this process. There is no doubt in my mind that HE is the only reason this mission has been so successful thus far!

Be Careful What You Ask For

I started my run yesterday at 6:45am.  It was 73 degrees and the dewpoint was 69...that meant very humid!  I didn't think so early in the morning the humidity would make a quick 2 hour run miserable but a few miles in, I was soaked in sweat and breathing was less than desirable.  I was praying for this person and that person but really not feeling the excitement that I normally get when running a long distance (which, by the way, goas was 14 miles that day) because it was so humid.  I decided to ask God to help me out.  I mean, why not, he's clearly come through for me in the past...why wouldn't he come through for me now?!  I said, "God, I'm out here doing this for you..only because you told me to..could I please have just a few tiny sprinkles to cool me off and cut the humidity for a minute?"  Wellllllll, you've read previous posts about how God REALLY does answer prayer?  Again, I called and He answered!!  Not exactly how I had imagined it though.  I kid you not, within 1 minute of that prayer, it rained!  However....instead of just a nice little 5 min sprinkle, it POURED on me for the next 5 miles!!!  I almost quit early sooo many times but I kept thinking how important these runs are towards the final goal so I continued to run, finally deciding to quit only 4 miles early.  Well, God had a different plan.  At 4 miles early, it quit raining and I was nowhere near my car...so on I went.  I ended up finishing all 14 miles in the most water-logged state of my life.

Lesson #1- Be careful what you ask God for...He does answer prayer...but in the way He sees fit :)
Lesson #2- When doing something for God, He WILL see you through to the end.  Whether it be something huge like traveling abroad or adopting a child or something small like running 14 miles in the rain, HE REIGNS YESTERDAY, TODAY AND FOREVER and He will make it happen!

*And, that was just pure coincidence that that phrase is what came to me while writing about rain =)

Teaming Up For Missions

Back when I first was deciding to or not to do this, I spent some time talking with a good friend, Nicole.  She has been running for years and has also run a couple marathons so I was turning to her looking for any advice and to get a feel for if she thought I had what it would take to complete 26 miles.  I'll never forget the night she called me (late June)..she was sooo excited to hear about how God was wanting to use me and running!  She said, "I'll run it with you!"  Knowing she had a leg that was giving her trouble and was coming into a busy summer, I was shocked.  I never expected that level of support but wow, was I excited!  She was willing to give up a lot of time in her summer to train for this race and be there to support me not only during training but in the race as well.  We are teaming up and trampling the ground for missions this summer and I couldn't be enjoying it more!  God has shown me a lot through the ups and downs of training but most of all, I've learned to have more faith and leave the details to Him.

Matthew 19:26 
Jesus said, "With man this is impossible, but with God all things are possible."

With all of that said....my toe is in question and Nicole has had off and on trouble with her leg.  Please keep both of us in your prayers that our master physician would keep us both in pristine physical health and able to complete the race to which God has called us.  Thank You!

We Have A Problem

Training has been going very very well.  Really, almost to well for someone who has only been running for a year.  Last weekend I hit the distance goal needed in order to be fully confident I can complete this race.  I ran 22 miles and shockingly, felt as if I had not run at all the next day.  God has been sooo on my side throughout all of this.  Then Monday night came...Meredith, completely by accident, stepped on my toe.  At the time it did not register any pain and we both went about business.  Later that night it was a little sore.  The next day I worked all day.  It was a little sore but did not limit me in any way for 12 hours on my feet.  At that time, the only thing that caused trouble was bending it.  I actually could not bend it at all.  That night I was awoken from my sleep with INTENSE toe pain.  I couldn't step on the foot at all.  I tried to hobble my way to the bathroom to get pain meds but the intensity of the pain caused me to be lightheaded and have to sit down.  Finally, I managed to get some Ibuprofen and make my way back to bed though little sleep followed.  I was sure it was broken.  Laying in bed, I accessed internet on my phone (can you even believe we live in a world where that is possible) and read that I would be looking at at least 4 weeks off from running if it was broken.  I started praying.  The race is only 6 weeks away and even though I am ready now, that would really set me back.  The next day, which is today, I spoke with my doctor and had xrays taken.  I am now just waiting for the results.  I have a lot of faith and believe that it cannot possibly be broken but I also know that the devil is real and would love nothing more than to sabotage this mission.  It is killing me to not be running right now but I also know that it is very important to let this heal.  I know that God is bigger than any obstacles I may run into so while I'm waiting for answers, I will just continue to lean on Him and pray for no broken bones and a very quick recovery.